By: Deacon Brian Miller
Seminarian, Fourth Theology
It is the law of the Church that seminarians in there last year at the seminary be transitional deacons. This makes my final year at the seminary unlike any other. Like all seminarians I attend daily mass with the seminary community, but I also have opportunities to exercise my diaconate service in the liturgies. This means that occasionally I serve at the altar and I preach daily homilies. I still live among my seminarian brethren, but I do so as one who has received sacred orders. The mark I have received at ordination configures to Christ the servant. I am a leader amongst the seminarians, but a leader who first serves his brethren. Christ says in the Gospels, “The one whom is going to be first, must be a servant of all.”
I am currently assigned at the Cathedral parish of St. Catharine of Siena for the school year. Each weekend I preach at a Sunday mass, baptize infants, visit the sick at the hospitals, minister to the youth group, and take part in the parish retreat team. It is a wonderful foretaste of what is to come for the rest of my life. I thank God for this opportunity. It is a blessing to work under the priests at the parish, and the parishioners have been truly supportive. The weekends are the best part of my week.
What I must remember is that we are still in the seminary formation process. I must admit it can be struggle for me at times. There is a part of me that wants to put aside the seminary activities and to get out into the parish life. I know that this is the wrong approach, God’s place for me right now is at the seminary. God has given me an opportunity, an opportunity to devote a lot of time and energy in my studies. I am receiving an outstanding education at St. Charles seminary. Right now I am learning about the beauty and richness of the mass so that I can say the mass with love and devotion. It is also an opportunity to take part in the beauty of the seminary liturgies. Just last week we celebrated our forty hours devotion, it is an unique time because during the devotion the community sung some of the most beautiful ancient chants that many Catholics do not have an opportunity to hear in their parishes. It is also an opportunity to spend time with my classmates. After the seminary is finished, we will be sent out to our respective diocese which will make getting together for fellowship very difficult. Fellowship among my fellow priests is an essential component of the priesthood. Are there not more than one times in the Gospels where Jesus and the twelve are together?
My diaconate year is the fruit of the formation, preparation, and discernment that took place in the last eight years. For those of you who are reading this and considering a vocation to the priesthood, may I suggest a couple of things that I have learned from my vocation journey. The first is be rooted in prayer. No one has a right to be a priest; he must be called by Jesus Christ. In the Gospels, it was Jesus who approached the twelve, called them, and made them fishers of men. Discerning the will of Father is impossible if one does not encounter him in prayer. For me, it took three years of prayers and discernment. Daily mass attendance, praying the rosary, reading and meditating on the Scriptures and frequent use of the sacrament of reconciliation were a major part of my discernment process. Even today I do all I can to make this a priority. Like of all us, I am not always faithful to this; but when I fail I ask the Lord to give the grace and desire to come back.
Second is to find a faithful priest to talk to. Find a priest who loves the priesthood. I believe that the best way to find such a priest is to search for one who truly loves the Mass. In my discernment journey I am bless with couple of those priests. They are inspirations for me. They show me that priesthood is a life worth living.
I ask for your prayers as I finish up my last year at St. Charles seminary. Specifically pray for me so that I may be a holy and faithful priest. I hope these words are up to you. May God bless your discernment. Seek his will in every aspect of your life.